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9 Things that society values but shouldn't

Madhurya
Oct 22, 2021
6 min read

All of us have parents who belong to Generation X and the Baby boomer generation. And it is a given that our society with a majority of Gen X population has preconceived notions or norms as to what life should be like, what careers should be like and what societies should look and function like. With this comes a lot of unrealistic norms and social conventions that the millennials and Gen Z need to agree upon and follow, without even the consideration of personal choice and opinions.

You can also check-out the audio version below.

Here are 9 things that our society values a lot, but it shouldn’t and instead needs to change its perspective on how people in a society should function and live.

The concept of respect being grandfathered in, rather than being earned

This is one thing people in our society impose on our generation. Millennials and Gen Z, have a strong belief that respect is earned with behavior and knowledge and is purely not based on one’s age.

Many a time, many of us are forced to respect people for their age and whether they deserve it or not.

Gender Stereotypes

Our society values a women’s decision on prioritizing childbearing over having a successful career and being a mother and doing it all. Similarly, men are bashed with unachievable standards of masculinity, and that being emotional, or having feelings and display of emotions by them are considered a heinous crime.

These are the most common stereotypes that we see on a daily basis in our society, there are a million others that our society has built upon over the decades.

Ours is a generation that believes in self-confidence, self-worth, and self-love, and believes in doing the kind of jobs we love, to follow the kind of passion we respect, we never pause to think if a certain choice we make fits into the societal norm and falls under any gender stereotypes.

We believe and value our dreams and purpose in life over societal norms and this is something that seems like an alien concept to our society and is often looked down upon.

The social status associated with financial worth

You may have heard many people tell you, money does not buy you happiness, but this is the kind of conditioning our society does to our minds. It creates this noble narrative in our heads that money is not everything, one should not always be behind money, don’t be greedy, be happy with what you have and many more…

Society forces your mind to believe that the desire to earn more and the feeling that you deserve more is a sin and being greedy.

Our society judges us solely based on our financial capabilities, the materialistic things we own, to give us a certain status in society.

Your social status is decided solely based on your financial capability and this is what society values when it should be valuing people for their kindness, behaviors, social contribution, community contribution.

Social media glam life

This is one raging lifestyle currently and is the most aspired lifestyle, that many are looking at adapting.

Many are using their kids to get into the social media game and destroying their kid’s privacy before they can even begin to understand the meaning of privacy. This glam life is encouraged and valued so much in society right now, that anyone who’s not on any social media platforms is treated as an outcast.

Not everything you see on Social media is true, those images, those lifestyles, those videos that you spend hours looking at, are all airbrushed and presented in front of you as idealistic and trending lifestyles. Instead, our society needs to value realistic lifestyles, build human relations and value them, rather than valuing the number of followers, likes, and comments you have in the world of social media.

The only way to get ahead in your career is by sucking up to senior employees at the workplace

This is one thing that has been abused to the core. There is a difference between sucking up to your seniors and being truly inspired and respecting them.

In our society, it is a common misconception, that sucking up to peers and senior employees is the only way to get ahead in your career. With this notion in their minds, many do tend to fall into this spiral of sucking up and fail very hard to get out and ruin their peace of mind and mental health because of it.

True knowledge, smart work, hard work, skill set, education, all play a key role in taking you to the next level in your career. It’s your hard work, determination, and skill set that take you further in your journey.

The preconceived notion about certain education and profession have the upper hand, having a better future

Everyone is a monk when it comes to solving others’ problems or giving solutions to others’ woes and sorrows. Our society favors certain professions, say, doctors, engineers, lawyers, and many more as being the best career paths and education routes for the younger generation.

Parents often tend to force their kids into doing engineering or studying medicine, as that is considered to be a respectable profession by society. One thing society fails to understand is that one does not have to follow these traditional career paths to be successful and well respected.

None of us knew 10 years ago that YouTubing would be such a hit career path. With how fast technology and the world is growing, our society needs to update its thinking and let go of these age-old beliefs and values, and believe in individuals’ capabilities, rather than tying their self-worth and self-respect to a degree and a profession.

Owning materialistic things to hold up to the social status

Our society values what kind of car you drive, what kind of house you live in, what kind of phone you own, rather than focusing on the real things, like character, behaviors, thoughts, opinions of individuals, education, emotional background.

It has become a cool concept for people to be in debt and own a lot of these materialistic things just to hold onto that social image that the society is expecting from them and thus spiralling down into a financial crisis and mental instability and depreciation of physical health.

Nobody cares about your financial commitments, all they want to see are nice flashy things and our society encourages this behavior a lot.

Unrealistic beauty standards showcased on social media and the movie industry

No one has flawless skin, all of us have our own insecurities, genes, and many more things that play a key role in determining our physical appearance.

We live in a world where we have a solution for every insecurity of yours about your appearance. Society values physical appearance over mental capabilities.

They have certain beauty standards that are to be followed to the dot, which is very unrealistic.

Our external appearance is our choice and responsibility, but society feels like it is, it’s given right for it to overpower us. Women having to go through unbearable pain to have no body hair, men having to maintain rock-hard abs, as shown in movies, are some of the beauty burdens society values a lot and imposes on us unapologetically.

Over a period of time, these standards become a burden on an individual, both mentally, physically, and financially.

Justification of an individual’s action

Our society feels prejudiced that it has control over everyone’s life and actions. It always seeks justification from people for certain actions. I agree, when you commit a crime, society wanting a justification is very much needed. But this is not at all what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about society feeling the need to get into the personal life of a couple, of wanting to know when they’ll have kids if they want kids, or justification about why you are friends with certain people, justification about fashion choices, justification about food choices and many more. They are called choices for a reason right, it’s an individual’s decision to pick what they want and what suits their lifestyle, likes, and dislikes better.

Wanting a justification for every action of an individual is the exact opposite of having the liberty of choice and opinion. When this is the case, what’s the point of living in a democratic nation. Let people be. Leave their choices to themselves. It’s their life.

These are 9 things that our so-called civilized society values the most when truly it shouldn’t be. Thank you for listening in.

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Thank you for taking out time to read our blog as part of Stensor- The Mind Chapter. Do remember this is coming from our experiences only. This is purely from our journey towards mental health and wellbeing. We are Architects by profession, with a design initiative part of Stensor-The Design Chapter, where we help our audience/clients design beautiful living spaces to enhance their lifestyle. If you’re looking to revamp your spaces, feel free to reach out to us via email at contact@stensor.in or Click Here to know more.